Monday, November 8, 2010

360. Siamese Dream. More Pumpkins smashed.

Album: Siamese Dream
Artist: The Smashing Pumpkins
Year: 1993
Genre: Metal


  1. Cherub Rock
  2. Quiet
  3. Today
  4. Hummer
  5. Rocket
  6. Disarm
  7. Soma
  8. Geek U.S.A.
  9. Mayonaise
  10. Spaceboy
  11. Silverfuck
  12. Sweet Sweet
  13. Luna

Again with the bloody Smashing Pumpkins. Seriously I've had enough of these annoying bastards after listening to their double album opus four times and feeling the pain every minute. Meeting them again was like meeting the most boring person in your high school at your workplace. The sight of them brought back all manner of unpleasant memories. It's more shouty angst-ridden vocals with grinding guitars and metal flourishes. It's more music that takes itself so damn seriously you can't help but want to shout "Lighten up!" at it repeatedly until it develops some semblance of perspective.

Apparently when this album was recorded the band was effectively falling apart in the studio. Sometimes bands can overcome this situation to produce greatness and sometimes conflict actually takes a group to new levels. In the case of the Smashing Pumpkins it made them depressed and angry, so it's more of the same really. Lead guitarist and baldy-shouty man Billy Corgan was fighting a battle with his weight which was apparently ballooning out and not doing anything to aid his crippling depression which at times prevented him from getting out of bed. The drummer was addicted to heroin which apparently the band resented but if anything they should have been grateful for. It's a law of some kind that every band like the pumpkins has to have a drug-addict in their ranks and if Chamberlain hadn't been shooting up excessively one of the others would have had to put their hand up and their arm out ready to receive the obligatory near OD. Further problems were caused by the two remaining band members who had been married but were now undergoing an acrimonious divorce.

So what sort of music do you think was produced by a tubby manic depressive, a junkie and two people who hated each other? If you answered "angry and depressed" then congratulations you win, and your prize can be a life without having to listen to the Pumpkins ever again. If you like your music shouty, angry and aggressive but prefer to keep your album listening under an hour then this is the release for you. If you prefer to extend your angst and irritation for an entire afternoon then get yourself onto the Melonchollie trip. Please don't bother me with it again.

Influenced by: Heroin, divorce and obesity.
Influenced: The sort of people Ben Folds sings about in Rockin the Suburbs

Highlight: The singles
Lowlight: Putting it on again and getting melonchollie flashbacks

Favourite Amazon Customer Review Quote:
"All grunge is sick and gross and horrific sounding trash. When i watched the videos to this group it just seemed satanic and the visuals were like a timeless deformity had swallowed the universe. one of their videos was about the 70s. I dont remember the 70s being like hell. i remember the 70s being soulful and fun. this group is a green stain and icky stench."

-A green stain and icky stench is a fantastic description of pretty much anything.

So is this album a siamese dream or a cojoined nightmare? Let me know below.


  1. So you dislike the Smashing Pumpkins, or so it seems. Out of the two albums though, is there a superior?

    Also, I vaguely remember Rolling Stone listing their 2007 album "Zeitgeist" on one their best-of 2007 albums list. Just something else for you to respond to :)

  2. Thankfully Zeitgeist isn't on the list so I've done all the pumpkins I have to. Siamese Dream is the superior of the two albums but only because it's shorter. Meloncholie really does need some editing. I'd go on record as saying there are very few double albums that wouldn't be better as a really tight single disc.